Letter to the Reader

Near the end of my junior year, I had to decide what classes I wanted to take the next year. I knew that my first choice was going to be sports literature. Speech scared me and I was never really into journalism. College composition caught my eye and I thought it might be the one. I did want to get better at writing and knew I was going to need it for college. It was a college level course so it would help prepare me and fill up my schedule. 

I thought I was a pretty good writer before I took this class.I would always put my papers off to the last minute and preferred to do them when I wanted. I would usually get a good grade so I was happy with it. Thinking back to it, my papers were not really as great as I thought. College Composition made me so much better than I previously was. I wish I could have known how to write like this throughout high school. I am glad I have learned everything for college though.


I learned a lot throughout my half-year of College Composition. We studied multiple different modes of writing. We also looked at various techniques in order to enhance our writing to the next level. The four modes of writing we studied this year were narrative, descriptive, expository, and persuasive. We also went into in-depth categories in exemplification which include definition, cause and effect, process analysis, classification and compare and contrast.  We also practiced each of these four modes. We would study each mode by reading articles  in order to learn which techniques professional writers used in each mode. After, we wrote a similar piece and for some we had peer review sessions. We would learn different strategies to help boost our papers also.These strategies include humor, quotes, anecdotes and flashbacks. Then we learned how to write better introductions, conclusions, and pick strong titles. Strong introductions and titles are what hooks the reader and makes it enjoyable. 


I believe I grew in many different areas as a writer during this course. One  area I noticed is in the structure of my papers. I felt as though my papers were never very organized and the flow was always off. After getting feedback from my peers during every session, I figured out how to sequence my events so they are easy to read and flow easily.


Another major area of growth I noticed after taking this course was my use of details in papers. All of my papers were full of details. In my Definition paper, I had to take out details because I had extras that crammed it up. When revising my papers, I made sure to read them over to see if I needed to add any detail.  Throughout these papers I enhanced my writing in more ways than just adding details. I also made use of the different strategies I learned. The main strategies I used were quotes and listing which are shown in my definition paper. I feel that my revised pieces show how much my writing has grown from the beginning of this course.


My portfolio showcases everything I learned throughout this course. I  revised three of my pieces I wrote during the course. I reflected on my changes in the papers. The reflection follows each revised paper.

Overall I think my writing has improved in every aspect. My papers flow a lot smoother, they have strong structure  and I can write longer papers with ease. I am confident I can write college level papers and i am proud I took the course.

Post 12--Exhibit 3 Focus for the Future--Descriptive

For this assignment I had to write about a person that had an impact on my life. I enjoyed this topic because I wanted to write about my brother. We were always close so I thought it would be an easy topic. We have had so many events and past occurrences where have helped each other.

I had to begin brainstorming different times in my life where he helped me. Being in my senior year, I remembered him pushing me to decide what college to go to. Then I began to write my paper. Ideas kept coming to me so I did not stop writing.

After I had reread my paper, I decided that it had plenty of examples but not enough dialogue. I decided to throw in some dialogue to help along with the flow.

After Ms. Basko reviewed my paper she pointed to some things I could work on with this paper. This was including more descriptions, imagery, dialogue, sensory details  and showing not telling. I took this all into consideration when I  edited my paper. I added in sensory details and then I tried to ass more showing and less telling. These fixes in the paper allowed it to improve and made it easier to read. 

The feedback I received from Ms. Basko not only helped me on this paper but it will help me with papers I write in the future. This feedback helped me realize that I have made the same mistakes in this paper that I make in every single paper I ever write. This is a problem that I have worked on throughout the year.

Jimmy Nugent

Ms. Basko

Descriptive Draft

03/1/13

Focus for the Future

           

Siblings are something almost everyone has or had in their life. They can be the best friend or worst enemy. My brother was always my friend. We would fight but it was never serious. Many of my friends told me that they always fought with their siblings. My brother and I have always been close.  He has always been there to push me to my limits. He makes sure that I focus on my future. He said I have the ability to do whatever I put my mind to. I really believe in everything I do and that is because of his inspiring attitude. He is a great person and one that many could learn from. The stories I remember about him will last forever. He has a legacy that I will cherish.
Ever since I can remember my brother was always my role model. Going to his high school reunion is a memory I have always have in my head of him. He went to college after working hard every day. He would practice golfing in the backyard or go to the course. It really inspired me to work hard every day in football. I played for a while and was pretty good at it. As he went to college I drifted away from sports and hung out with my friends more. It made me always want to follow in his footsteps. he came back from college and got a nice, steady job. I was really proud of him.

My sixteenth birthday was the day my brother gave me bittersweet news. He said I could work at the golf course where he is head pro. I couldn’t wait to work with him but didn't want to lose my free time. He told me that I would come to find that having money is a great thing. That was another time he gave me a lesson. Saving money is something you will always cherish.

Picking out what college to go to is a big decision for many juniors and seniors. I had no clue where I wanted to go and what my major would be. I’d never really given thought to either one. Thats when I looked to my brother to direct me. One day when my brother came over, he forced me to get up and look at all the different places i could go. I had gotten my email flooded with letters from colleges giving me all the  information about them.

One specific school that caught my eye was University of South Florida. I had seen that name somewhere but I couldn't remember. Then it hit me. They play in the Big East conference against Syracuse. I always wanted to be able to watch Syracuse games. Going to this school would allow me to. It also had the Business Administration major I wanted. Ever since that day I was awaken to the real world. My brother really helped shape me in the right path. Now all I had to do was get my grades up save money up.

Seeing my brother succeed at golfing I always wanted to get better at a sport. For some reason, I chose basketball. I knew my brother was good at it because we had a basket in our front yard. He would always beat his friends but I was never really good at it. I asked him for help in my journey to the top. I knew that he could coach me into a better player. We went the YMCA after school every day for two weeks straight working on my fundamentals. Soon enough I was beating all of my friends. I could sense that they all envied my skills. I was really proud of all the effort I put into basketball. I knew he could teach me though. He always had a role model aspect to him. He always aspired to be the best he could.

Recently my brother has been looking for a house. It really made me realize how much success he actually has gained. He put hard work into golfing which lead to gto getting a scholarship for his college. Then he got out of college and found a well paying, steady job. Seeing him searching for a house made me realize how mature he was. He put in his offer for the house and it was accepted. It was a big move in his life. I could really see how happy he was. It has inspired me to work harder everyday.

The saying goes that you learn something new everyday. I believe that because my brother teaches me something everyday. I always had something to look forward to when I woke up. My life has been different since my brother has been there. I can’t wait to see what the future holds.

Post 11- Exhibit 2 Obtaining Success and Enjoying It--Definition

Before I began drafting this paper our class read two different pieces in order to learn proper techniques and strategies for writing a definition paper. The two pieces we read were “Guys vs. Men” by Dave Barry and “The Wife-Beater” by Gayle Rosenwald Smith. These pieces spoke about different opinions and stereotypes on clothing, social groups and ideas. This pieces really helped me understand how to write a solid paper.

I started to brainstorm a topic after studying these two pieces . I at first was thinking about which article of clothing I wanted to write about. It then hit me that I did not have to write about clothing. Different ideas came into my head but I finally stuck with defining the idea of success.

After re-reading my first draft, I was somewhat surprised about what I wrote . I felt as though I never knew I could define an idea so well. I thought that there was not any errors to be found. I guess having another peer review session helped me figure out what was wrong. After getting feedback on my paper, which helped me during my rewrite, I knew what I needed to fix. The main pieces of criticism I received was unnecessary writing between points, not enough statistics and quotes.

The first thing I did when I rewrote the piece was adding in quotes. I did not have any quotes throughout my paper so it was bland. I feel that my paper flows smoother now. I made sure that I liked my title and I did not want it to be one word. When I revised the paper, I tried to clear out the unnecessary wording. Once I completed my paper, I added in quotes about success.  Statistics were also placed accordingly throughout the paper.

After re-reading my final piece, I am very proud because I feel as I have grown as a writer over the course. It really made me realize that I can go into detail on almost anything. 

Obtaining Success and Enjoying It

​To be successful in life is something every person wishes for. How one becomes successful is defined differently by each individual. Success is defined by Merriam-Webster as “ degree or measure of succeeding, favorable or desired outcome and also the attainment of wealth, favor, or eminence.“If you don’t build your dream, someone else will hire you to help them build theirs.” is a quote by Dhirubhai Ambani. This really helps to make you understand success. Another definition of success is attaining desired and justified goal using sound planning and execution.   

For me, success means that I can do everything I want to do.   However, can do something is very different from wanting to do something.   Sometimes we have chances of making our dreams come true.   

But without capability, we can only let chances pass away.   It is to say, success in life comes from careful planning more than from only taking risks or chances.   
  I consider success in three scopes. In its narrow scope, we usually experience success in our day-to-day life, for example, finishing a project on time. In its intermediate scope, success is achieving significant milestones of life: graduation, getting a job, and finding a right partner. Accumulating these successes lead to the broad scope. In this scope, which often considers a person's lifespan, success is defined in 3 terms: possession, power, and philanthropy.

Possession defines financial freedom and sound physical and mental fitness.

Power defines fame, recognition, and a leadership position.

Philanthropy defines a person's win-win attitude and contribution to upbringing of positive changes in community. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”-

Thomas A. Edison. This quote by Thomas Edison practically describes philanthropy.

I do not limit success to what most people in their predictable way define success: great career, big paycheck, nice house, and new car. Studies show that successful people are more likely to be happy then other who are not.

However, financial freedom is usually a pre-condition for philanthropy. Success is making fortune while traversing path to attaining significant accomplishments and thereby providing something that community can benefit from and remember.

The prerequisite on this journey to success is self-awareness.

Personal values, culture, education, and experience emphasize different traits and principles in different persons. These along with a great control over spiritual and emotional bodies and self assessment can better set individual goals and drive towards those with perseverance and persistence.

One needs to find what realistic goals bring one joy and happiness. Personal successes are a measure of the ability of individuals and have different ideas. Most people advocate the definition of personal success, plan it and set a goal for it.

For one to truly be successful, they must not base their success on what has been accomplished through their lives, but simply how happy what they have accomplished makes them feel.

 When someone sets out to achieve a desired goal, and accomplishes this goal, that sense of fulfillment is success.   This sense of achievement, brings on happiness; a positive outcome.   Not being able to achieve that goal results in disappointment which is a negative outcome.   

This is why I believe that true success lies within the happiness of the person. True success requires respect, appreciation, integrity, and patience. All of which are traits that by human nature are genuinely difficult to attain.

Especially in the face of modern marketers who relentlessly deceive us, control our thoughts, and usurp our independence in order to increase their bottom line.

Post 10 Exhibit 1-The Wrong Call, narrative

Before I wrote my narrative draft, we read Growing Up, Throwing Up in class. This piece helped me understand how to write a narrative. I had a good time writing my paper for this assignment. I had to pick a childhood memory and tell the story.I did not quite know which memory I wanted to use. Then I remembered when I had gotten in trouble in 5th grade. The idea came to me very quickly. Ever since the event happened it always has stayed in my memory. Writing the paper was not that difficult either because the story was very vivid in my head. I thought that the flow might need work. That is one of the areas I wanted feedback on. I finished it so quickly after I had gotten started. 

The easiest parts of writing it was adding supporting details and dialogue. I feel that I also could have used more transitions. Organization is also an area that I thought I might need help with. I feel as though I could have added more dialogue to the paper. This was one of my main fixes on my revision.

The peer editing process really helped me understand where I went wrong with my paper. I at first thought that there was not anything wrong with my paper. Having one of my peers help point out errors and where I could make fixes really helped me understand. I learned that I needed to add in transitions, dialogue and verbs. from reading others papers I learned that it is easy to make mistakes. My writing was not that bad and my peers were similar in what they needed to work on. Adding in a couple of anecdotes would have really brought it all together. I learned that the structure was done very well but adding in dialogue was a main issue.

I added a few parts of dialogue and made the flow and structure of the overall paper better. I ordered all of the events properly and made sure it all made sense. I am pretty happy with the overall outcome of the paper. Since I had finished the paper quickly and thought it was perfect, I am finally happy it is. It now flows very well and is easy to understand. I hope that whoever reads the piece can feel that I wrote it. I have kept that a secret for all of the school years I have been through and I wanted people to finally know what happened. I learned more about the story when writing the paper, more than I thought I remembered. I learned to not worry about the order of the rough draft. anything can be fixed in the final draft. As choppy as my first draft was, I finally had fixed it and made it into my favorite story.

 Fifth grade was one of my favorite years of school. Waking up in the spring at 7am is usually not too bad for me. The smells and brightness make it beautiful. This day however, was a Monday morning. I had awakened to my mother yelling for me to get up. I was tired from hanging out with my brother the night before. I looked outside my bedroom window and saw dark clouds and rain. The outlook on the day started out gloomy.I finally got ready and got on the bus. I hated taking the bus because I was always picked up first and dropped off last. I almost spent as much time on the bus as the driver. I didn't really have many friends on my bus either. I got to school and walked to my class. My teacher was nice but she was corny and boring. I thought we would have our usual boring lessons that I couldn't stand. I like to be interactive in class and use my hands. It all seemed like it was a regular day.

The class next to me had a few of my friends in it but we didn't really get to talk during our subject lessons. Sam was a friend of a friend who I had gotten to like after hanging out with him often. We were both huge Star Wars fans. He had the coolest book about the weapons, vehicles and characters. Andrew was our in between friend that helped us meet. He was in my class so we talked a lot. My teacher told us our plan for the day was to mix with another class and share projects. While we were waiting around in my classroom, Sam walked in with his class. I was happy because now Andrew, Sam and I could talk and relax. We were standing over in the corner while everyone was talking to each other. Sam was always a sneakin and convincing person. Out of the blue, he had dared me to do something I had never thought of doing. It blanked on me that this could get me in trouble. I felt like it didnt matter and wasn't a big deal. He dared me to call 911. I thought that it was a stupid thing to ask. I saw that the phone was on the hook so I moved it slightly. I wanted it to look like the call was being made but not actually work. I pressed the 3 numbers softly making sure he saw me. I can still hear him ask me “Did you call?” I replied “ Of course I called. Didn't you see me Andrew?” Andrew stood there with a blank, weird look on his face. He then pointed out to me that the phone was working and the call went through. That is when I started to get nervous. They both started laughing at me which is then when I asked my teacher if i could use the restroom. She being a teacher had to reply with “ I don't know, can you?” Being in a rush to get out the classroom, I asked if I may go and left. My friends decided to follow me into the bathroom to stress me out. I saw my other friend, Dave, in the bathroom and explained the mishap to him. He found it funny but helped calm me down. He said “Don’t worry about it. You are not going to get into trouble.” After I reassured myself I would be ok, I walked back to the room. That is when I heard my teacher say “ Did someone call 911?” I never knew that the phone line had to go through Bay Trail before the call was finished. I knew it was all over after that.

The last thing I remember after those words was being in the principal’s office. I had not really ever been there so I didn't know what to expect. I waited for him to give me bad news but was pleasantly surprised. He said that it wouldn't go on my “permanent record”. Those words had scared me before and I was in shock. I sat in the chair and smiled up at him. He had then dropped a bomb on me. He said that I would be suspended. I thought “Oh no my parents are gonna be so mad”. When I got home, they said “ What’s wrong with you?!” After a long explanation, they finally understood that it wasn't such a big deal. One day was not as bad of a suspension I thought it would be. I got to lay in bed all day. Me and my dogs watched my favorite TV shows. I had a great day and got to see my friends the next day. They were all jealous and wanted to see what it was like. I thought I had created a group of monster and devious 5th graders. I could never look my teacher in the eyes again. I always felt like he had a built up hatred for me. I couldn't have cared less because she was a terrible person. She would always criticize my writing and tore me apart in my notebooks. I will never forget my 5th grade memory. It has stuck with me all my life and has been a great story to tell.

Post #7

Point by Point-

Basketball and Football are two of the most popular sports played. They are also similar and diverse. To play football, a team must have eleven players on the field. To avoid forfeiting a basketball game, five players must be on the court. The correct clothing for football will include shoulder, knee, thigh, and rib pads, cleats, a helmet, and a mouthpiece. A basketball player does not need all of this protective gear.All that's needed to play basketball is shoes and shorts.

Subject by Subject-
Pizza Hut is known for its outstanding crust. The crust is soft and flaky. Pizza Hut has cheesy bread sticks  Pizza Hut serves breakfasts pizza in the morning. Pizza Hut has a meat lover's pizza.

Papa John's signature flavor comes from the sauce. The sauce is homemade and uses fresh ingredients. Pap John's has garlic bread sticks.  Papa John's doesn't sell breakfast pizza. Papa John's has buffalo chicken and chicken bacon ranch pizza.

"Post # 6: Techniques Used in “Red, White, and Beer.”

There were several different techniques used in "Red, White and Beer."
1.Descriptive writing to describes the beer
2.Comparitive writing to compare the different beers
3.Humor
4.Sensory Details
5.Sarcasm

Post #5

Today I hope to complete my body paragraph on the facts, ingredients and feel of the chocolates.